Ideas for Honoring a Deceased Relative at a Wedding

Often when planning a wedding, it can be difficult to think of a way to honor a deceased relative that has played an important role in the bride or groom’s life. Here are some tips on how a bride or groom can honor their deceased relatives at the wedding:



    • Set up a special small table at the wedding reception with a flower arrangement and a card saying “In memory of those loved ones who are not with us today” or more specifically, “In memory of Jane Doe, mother of the bride.” You could also put a picture of the bride or groom with the deceased person you are honoring.


    • At the end of the wedding program, it is appropriate to add a memoriam line. For example, you might write “Today we honor those who could not be with us, especially the groom’s grandmother, Jane Doe.”


    • If the person who is conducting the ceremony is someone who knew the deceased relative, it might be appropriate for him/her to say something during the ceremony – particularly if they are saying a homily or other sermon-like speech. They might say “Today, we have come together to celebrate the love of these two people and the life they are building together. As many of you know, the groom’s father recently passed away. And in times like these, it can be more important than ever to honor love and family. I know (groom’s father) was so happy to see (groom) find the love he has with (bride). Although it would be easy for his recent death to make this a sad occasion, (Groom’s father) would want to see you all so happy today, celebrating and full of joy. So today, let’s remember how precious life is, and be thankful that (bride and groom) are creating a new family together.”


    • Leave an empty chair for a deceased relative/parent at the wedding ceremony – you could have a sibling place a flower on the seat in honor of the mother during the seating of the parents


    • Read a letter from the deceased relative they sent to you as a child


  • Carry or wear a momento from that relative the day of the wedding (example your grandmother’s brooch or grandfather’s pocket watch)

It’s all about you honey!

I have had several brides and friends make comments to me that they wanted a certain color or a certain flower, but their bridesmaids did not. I always find this amazing – whose wedding is it anyway? While a good opinion from a bridesmaid is great – honey – it is all about you! If you want chocolate brown dresses with white roses – this is your dream day – go for it! Graciously accept the bridesmaids’ opinions and then share with them your vision for your big day. I am sure they will understand after you explain this is what you have been dreaming about! So just remember – it is all about your honey!


Happy planning!

Size Matters…

Is it just me (& my now husband) or do all couples struggle with finding the right number of guest to invite to their wedding? Our original guest list started with over 500 people and we finally adjusted it down to 300. So how do you determine the magic number for your big day? Keep in mind 3 things…1)Who is paying for the wedding? If it is your parents or a relative, you will want to be considerate of who they want to invite to share in the big event – after all, they are signing the checks. 2) Does your budget match your guest list? If you have 600 people on the list and can only afford to feed 400, it is time to make some cuts 3)Lastly – does you guest list match your wedding vision? Did you always dream of a small, intimate wedding with just close family and friends? If so, make it happen! Moral of the story – size does matter, at least when it comes to the size of your guest list. Happy planning!